8 Tips when Visiting Manila Ocean Park

My daughter is 3 and there’s not a lot of places that a child that age can go to, except for the mall’s play places.

Fortunately, there’s Manila Ocean Park, which is a decent place for a day trip for kids of all ages.

Here are eight valuable tips BEFORE visiting Manila Ocean Park for a more pleasant experience.

Tip # 1: If you are going to Manila Ocean Park, look at the various deals available for the season. Metrodeal does NOT offer the best value for your money.

I bought this Manila Ocean Park deal — Ocean’s Sky Wonder: Enjoy 10-in-1 Attractions at Manila Ocean Park for P799 instead of P4100.

Deal Highlights:

• Experience the ultimate Manila Ocean Park adventure as it levels up with Ocean’s Sky Wonder, which features 10-in-1 attractions for the whole family to enjoy
• Enjoy day and night fun and excitement with attractions and shows at Manila Ocean Park featuring:
  • Oceanarium
  • Trails to Antarctica (Penguin Exhibit and Christmas Village)
  • All-Star Bird Show
  • Symphony Evening Show
  • Birds of Prey Kingdom
  • Barnyard
  • Birdhouse
  • Sharks & Rays Dry Encounter
  • Penguin Talk Show
• The Oceanarium is home to 14,000 marine creatures from around 277 species, all indigenous to the Philippines and Southeast Asia.
• At the heart of the Oceanarium is a 25-meter long, 220-degree curved walkway tunnel with a spectacular underwater view of amazing sea creatures swimming overhead
• Interact with little creatures like hamsters, rabbits, and chickens. Learn how these small animals make huge contributions to the planet in The Barnyard
• Be surrounded with hundreds of colorful Budgies in the Birdhouse. Watch them fly around you and have a chance to feed them on your hands
• Sharks and Rays Dry Encounter allows you to touch stingrays in Acquatica’s outdoor pool without getting wet
• Trails to Antarctica features a walk-through exhibit of the frozen continent, live Humbolt penguins and a festive Christmas Village
• Birds of Prey Kingdom features one of the most stunning coastal raptors in the country, the Brahminy Kites (Haliastur indus) in their unique bird sanctuary
• All Star Bird Show showcases the beauty and intelligence of our fine-feathered friends in a highly entertaining show for the whole family
• Watch a display of huge water fountains as the Symphony Evening Show ignites the night sky with larger than life distinct characters from the sea
• Experience real-time digital puppetry in a theater setting at the Penguin Talk Show. Get a chance to interact with Hamboo the Penguin

I thought I was getting a greater and cheaper deal. However, when we arrived in Manila Ocean Park, we saw that you can buy the following deals on the spot:

A short analysis comparing the different packages to the Metrodeal’s Php 799 deal showed that depending on the season, sometimes, the Metrodeal is better, and other times, buying onsite is better.

Looking at the different rides, here’s the deals available for the park onsite ticket for the period of December 1, 2018 to February 28, 2019 vs. Metrodeal’s Php 799 “promo”:

Depending on the rides which you want, I would have simply just bought the park’s complete package worth Php 995.00, vs. Metrodeal’s Php 799, as I will pay only Php 200 more, but will get 4 to 5 more attractions, including entrance to the World of Creepy Crawlies, Super Toy Collection and Fish Spa.

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Tip # 2: Go on a weekday, NOT on a Sunday.

I didn’t heed my own advice, and this was the crowd when we went after lunch on a Sunday.

It was FULL of people — lots of field trip groups and families last February 3. I have been to Manila Ocean Park multiple times, and it was never this crowded. Luckily, Manila Ocean Park is becoming a hit to Filipinos everywhere, and is a good day place to visit for people of all ages.

It was hot, crowded and slightly uncomfortable. In Ocean Park’s defense, the crowd thinned out when we left at around 4:30pm.

Still, why go on the peak hours if you can go on a more relaxing less crowded pace?

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Tip # 3: No need to stress and pre-plan the itinerary. Just go with the flow of the park. Following the route, you will still see all attractions even if you have no map on hand.

When you arrive and buy your tickets, you just have to follow the park’s flow to see all the attractions. From the expansive park entrance,

The first attraction you will see is the Birds of Prey exhibits on your right. The attraction allows you to view and take photo with the Philippines national bird, the Philippines Eagle.

In other ocean park’s, you have to pay extra for the photo. Here at Manila Ocean Park, it’s Free, so take advantage of a photo session with our Philippines eagles:

The next attraction is the Oceanarium.

Warning: This is not the Hong Kong Ocean Park, so please manage your expectations accordingly. The Oceanarium is slightly hot (maybe it’s crowded) and requires strong AC. There are also a lot less varieties of fishes vs. other ocean parks. But for Philippines standard, it’s fine.

When you enter the Oceanarium, you are first treated to a cool Jungle Trek where you see a lot of hanging plants, large fishes and a live crocodile/alligator who at the time of our visit was getting a water jet massage by the waterfall:

It’s not a large amount of space, but the park manages to keep it interesting by allowing you to go up and down the stairs and see many different things as you go along.

Then the proper Oceanarium, where there’s a lot of tropical fishes to look into. Not as much as Hong Kong’s, but at least, enough for the regular Filipino visitor.

The Living Ocean exhibit inside the Oceanarium was a highlight of the visit, as such ability to walk through the “ocean” is something special for the Filipinos. The park brochures calls it:

At the heart of the Oceanarium is a 25-meter long, 220-degree curved walkway tunnel with a spectacular underwater view of amazing sea creatures swimming overhead

Here you can see various types of sharks:

And you can even pay extra to walk among the big fishes. If you plan to do so abroad, just do it here at the Manila Ocean Park.

Cheaper price, better service, and the team at Manila Ocean Park does its best to accommodate special requests.

For example, a friend of mine pulled off a surprise proposal at the Manila Ocean Park. The girl was there with family, and the guy was there in the water wearing scuba diving gear to propose to her.

It was very romantic, and done at a reasonable price.

Extra wonderful: She said YES! 🙂

At the end of the exhibit, you can place your hand in this open aquarium to have fishes clean your hand. Something worth a try.

Perfectly safe, just a nice sensation overall.

You can also have very nice photos taken on a less crowded area of the aquarium.

Following the Oceanarium, you have to go up the stairs to go to the Fish Spa. 

When we went, it was CROWDED with people.

However, if you were lucky enough to not go on a weekend and there weren’t anyone around, the Fish Spa is a great place to relax and clean your dirty feet.

Right beside the Fish Spa are some token cars that the little kiddos loved.

We spent a good half hour trying the few rides and relaxing. At this point, you are now mid-way finished with the park.

The next attraction is the Trails of Antartica, where you can view and take photos with the handsome penguins:

Our friends from Hong Kong were surprised that the park charged only Php 500 for a printed photo of visitors (Max: 4 people) feeding and taking photo with the penguins.

It was a complete steal especially since Hong Kong Ocean park charged a LOT MORE for such souvenir.

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So Tip # 4: When you are at Manila Ocean Park, pay the Php500 and take the photo with the penguins with your family as a souvenir.

It’s worth it. Quality was terrific for the price.

The Festive village at the end of the penguin attraction was a downer. There was no real snow compared to when it first opened, and its snow making machine was reduced to a single workable machine which churned out small tufts of snow:

Oh well, you didn’t go to Manila Ocean Park for the snow, right? So can’t complain since this isn’t the right venue for snow watching anyway.

Tip #5: Buy from the Park Souvenir Shop.

At the end of the exhibit was the park’s Souvenir shop.

I kid you not — the selection was quite extensive, and the prices uber reasonable!

A large seahorse pillow cost only Php 800.

A blue toddler shark backpack put us back only Php 300.

The T-Shirts I think was less than php 300 each!

Almost everything in the Manila Ocean Park souvenir shop was of decent quality sold at a reasonable price. I would strongly suggest you buy souvenirs at the Manila Ocean Park gift shops as they’re really a great bang for buck.

Here we are, very much delighted with our purchases.

We then moved on to the next exhibit, which is the Jellyfish exhibit.

This exhibit was significantly smaller than when the park first opened. What’s more, there was a limited variety of jellyfishes exhibited.

However, I love jellyfishes and can stare at them for a long time. Hence, it doesn’t really matter to me that it’s smaller, but that it was part of our ticket.

Tip # 6: Rest and buy food and drinks inside the park.

Compared to other parks, the Manila Ocean Park offered an extensive number of food and drinks available at a reasonable price.

It’s not like Disneyland where all you had to eat where turkey legs and fries, and you had to pay for an exorbitant amount of money just to get your grub.

At the Manila Ocean Park, you can buy food and drinks at mall prices, and they won’t cost you an arm and a leg.

Hence, you don’t need to bring your own food at the park. All you have to do is bring a small bottle of water, and buy the rest of your snacks at the park to rejuvenate.

Tip # 7: Go and see all the live shows.

We didn’t follow our own advice since our companions were already super tired after the jellyfish exhibit. For your information, here are the attraction’s showtimes so as to plan a better trip.

However, if you’re not tired, I strongly suggest that you not miss out the live shows prepared by the park:

They are delightful and interesting. Just too bad we had to give it a miss, because our visitors were poofed.

Tip # 8: Visit the Manila Ocean Park with your family.

It ain’t the best park in Asia, but for the price you have to pay for the enjoyment, it’s pretty good for the buck.

There is parking available —- we paid Php 40 tip to the guys outside the park — the tickets are reasonable, and everything inside the park is not expensively priced.

The park is still in the Philippines so you have to manage your expectations but when all is said and done, it’s still an afternoon of fun at a huge price cut from other parks around the world.

EXTRA: Additional itinerary suggestions if you’re going to Manila Ocean Park in the afternoon:

Option 1: Tour the Old City Intramuros or do a Binondo Walking Tour in the morning, and then Manila Ocean Park in the afternoon. Here are some tour options we’ve tried and like:

• Manila for a Day with Dustin: We highly recommend their 3G: God, Gold, & Glory Tour
• Carlos Cedran Intramuros Walking Tour: Email him at celdrantours@hotmail.com
• Binondo Food Walking Tour
• Slum Tour: Smokey Tours: We visited Baseco and it was an eye opener for us.

For dinner, I would take our foreign guests to any of the nearby Filipino restaurants:

• Barbara Heritage Restaurant: With Dinner and dancing. Highly recommended. Please make a reservation.
• Aristocrat: An institution. Please make sure to order their BBQ Chicken with Java Rice, and Pancit Canton. Also order their halo halo, sago and gulaman, and their buco juice.
• The Singing Cooks atbp: Where the cooks and waiters seranade you as you eat
• You can also do a Manila Dinner Cruise if you wish.

Hope you can make time to visit Manila Ocean Park. I’m glad we did. For more details, please do not hesitate to call the park at:

Manila Ocean Park
Pasay Boulevard Manila
Phone: (632) 567-7777 loc 118, 119, 123
Website: http://www.manilaoceanpark.com/

When Relatives Make Bad Decisions

My biggest weakness is my pride.

I believe that before I make an important decision, I have already give that idea a great bit of thought. Not only do I make a decision based on the facts at hand, but I also look at other factors that may affect my decision, and think about Plan B, C, and D.

In short, I love seeing how a situation looks like, and then making plans accordingly. I pride myself into making some very good decisions in life.

As I’ve said, my biggest weakness is pride.

Hence, it bothers me when people around me want to make seemingly bad decisions.

I scratch my head and wonder why they cannot see the same problems that I see, and still choose to continue their course of action, even though it leads to the edge of the cliff.

I cannot comprehend how they can still make stupid decisions, despite knowing that they’re running to their death.

Why can they not see what I see?

Why do they keep on making the same darn mistakes over and over?

One of my relatives is one of these people.

He had been unemployed for years, working on projects here and there.

One year, he managed to persuade a friend to invest in a few million pesos to start a business with him. Technically, my relative will do all the legwork, get paid a generous salary, and his partner will give him the money. This is in assumption that my relative will build a business that would make both of them money.

My relative processed the business, built a business, hired a handful of staff, and had zero customers.

“It’s Partner’s fault,” my relative scoffed. “He didn’t give me even more money to make sure the business succeeds. So we built an office, but couldn’t get customers because he didn’t send more money.”

Who was at fault, we won’t really know. We can only hear the side of my relatives where he came off smelling like a rose.

But this isn’t the first partner who had lost money after working with him. Actually, he has had quite a list of ex-partners, and they only had disappointing stories to tell after working with my relative.

“But I am built as an entrepreneur,” my relative said. “It is my calling. It just isn’t the right idea.”

Given that he has invested no money of his own, that statement is unfair. The partner loses money, while my relative has profited off his partner having been paid a generous salary. At the end of the day, I feel bad for his partners who seem to lose money whenever they invest on something my relative has pitched to.

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I remember that business idea vividly. There were many holes to that idea.

They wanted to build a medical health business even though one was a travel agent, and the other was a teacher. None of them were doctors.

They were both foreigners and could not speak Mandarin. Operations would require them to speak in the local language.

They had no network of clients, only the hopes of it. They only traveled in the expat circles and knew none of the rich Chinese they hoped to make money from.

They wanted to build the office at an expensive part of town. But it was in the upper floor where there was minimal foot traffic.

I have expressed my doubts to him when he visited us. While there was a 60 page business plan, holes on this plan made it seem clear that it was bound to fail.

And yet, everyone hoped that this idea would succeed.

After all, every 6 months, he would come up with a brand new idea that would hopefully make him a millionaire.

“Yes Bonita,” he replied. “I heard you, but you don’t really know what you’re doing because you’re not in the situation.”

Great, I am chided on for being ignorant, for not knowing the entire facts. And for being unsupportive.

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Months later, as the business crashed and burned, my relative came back in his defense asking, “Why didn’t anyone stop me?”

O M G.

Seriously?

Nobody stopped you?

What do you mean nobody stopped you?

I made my concerns vocal, told you of the holes in your wonderful plan to which you have no answers, and you just not listened, nodded your head and still went your own way.

I tried to ask you relevant questions related to his business, hoping he would use it as feedback on how to make his business better, and after ignoring my concerns, found that such concerns were really valid and were the cause of his failed business.

And I didn’t stop you?

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Now, he is in his nth wonderful idea.

After years of employment, he finally took on the job as an English teaching in China.

After finally being employed teaching English in China and earning a generous wage, the relative declared that it was not his hope to teach English as this was the type of job white people are embarrassed to have.

“I am not happy being an English teacher,” he said. “I would like to be an entrepreneur as this is my calling.”

So his plan was to sell the home that’s under his wife’s name, and move the entire family to the United Kingdom, because hey, he likes the UK.

There was a serious lack of thought in such major life decision change:

1. He is not a UK taxpayer or citizen. They have a 4 year old daughter: Will her education be free or cheap?
2. He is already in his mid-40s and does not have any relevant corporate experience. He doesn’t want to do menial jobs, and want a job that pays well so he can support his family of 3. However, he doesn’t have any technical skill, and is currently an English teacher in China despite not having any educational degree.
3. His family will start from scratch. Wife will have to start looking for a job after getting rid of a good gig from China. He cannot teach English in the UK. His Chinese is bad, so he cannot teach Chinese in Britain.
4. Where will they live? How can they afford their home and their cost of living? How can they have income?

But the general plan is — Sell the home that was gifted to his wife by her parents in China, and use that money to fund their move to the UK and hopefully find a source of income there.

“I can start selling ginger candy from the Philippines in Amazon UK,” he said.

As if it was that simple.

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It takes a lot of effort not to challenge a relative when they make seemingly stupid decisions that affect other people.

On one point, as a man, I understand his need to be secure in his ability to provide for his family after many years of hopping from one job to the other. I am sure it is emasculating for him to have his wife be the breadwinner for many years.

On the other hand, I do not understand why he can’t just accept whatever job he is qualified for, and work up from where he is.

Teaching is NOT an embarrassment when it puts food on your table.

Why hope to be like Jeff Bezos if you can’t even hold a job?

“Bonita, STOP CHALLENGING ME,” he said. “I know what I am doing. It seems that every time I talk to you, it’s a challenge.”

I shut up after that.

I keep quiet despite hearing his dreams of grandeur and his wanting to be British even though he isn’t.

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At the end of the day, getting sucked in my relatives vortex is just more headache for me. To be honest, his life decisions do not affect me or my family. I am not expected to fund him, or to carry any of his work, or to support his family when they fail.

And if he is driving a train with a wreck that’s waiting to happen, it should NOT involve me at all.

He wants neither my help, opinion or support.

So I have to accept in my heart to just let this matter go. Let him make the wrong decisions in his life and suffer the consequences. Let his family suffer from his foolishness.

It is their life, not mine.

Once I can accept this, I remove myself from his mess, and not worry about him at all. Why worry when you can’t do anything? Why bother even helping if it’s not welcome? It just isn’t healthy at all.

Hence, this is what I will do.

I will let sleeping dogs lie, pray for him and his family, and hope for the best.

Hopefully, his best laid plans will make him fulfill his dreams.

Or it won’t.

Regardless, I take no credit or delight with the results. All I can do is to stay still, listen and watch the show.

Have a good week everyone!

 

 

 

Unlucky Week: When you deal with people who are malabong kausap

This has not been a great week.

I have been a victim of people who are malabong kausap (people with no word of honor) several times this week. It’s annoying.

There’s an online seller who had agreed to sell to me a branded bag at an x price. Everything was already confirmed and settled and I was just going to pickup and pay for the bag.

Before we met, he messaged me, “Bonita, I’m so sorry, but someone gave me a higher offer, and I really need the money so I am giving her the bag.”

The offer was x plus Php 1,000 so it was truly annoying. It wasn’t that I couldn’t match the Php 1,000. Rather, it was that the deal was already struck, and he backed out instead of informing me that someone was offering a higher price for the bag.

I had another company who confirmed a quotation, but then charged me a higher price once I was about to pay. 

This bad luck has moved to my personal life.

I also hired a private tutor for my daughter this week.

On her ad, she said she was “responsible, hardworking and patient with kids.”

On the day she was supposed to teach for the first time, she messaged me that she was not feeling well.

Later on, she messaged me again to say that I need to find another tutor.

Bwisit.

I would like to look at the positives in this unfortunate situations. This quotation comes to mind: 

Maybe there is a better bag for me.

Maybe there is a better solution for my business.

Maybe there is a better tutor for my daughter.

Still, it’s very frustrating. Hopefully, my bad luck would end. Happy Chinese New Year!

 

Only in the Philippines: Palusot Queen

My promodiser was caught sleeping on duty. She was suspended for three days, as she had a tendency to sleep on the job and was vocally warned multiple times.

“I didn’t sleep on the job,” she wrote in her incident report. “I only closed my eyes.”

Great, at least she didn’t say that she was praying instead of working.

Upon inspection of her kiosk, the security guard found out that several unpaid items belonging to other concessionaires were hidden inside our kiosk.

“Ma’m, I have no idea how the outright items got there,” she wrote. “I did borrow the items from the concessionaire and put it inside the kiosk to reserve the item. I plan to pay for them once I received my salary.”

Accounts made by the concessionaire claim that she had no clue that my diser had the missing earrings in her possession. She didn’t lend it to my promodiser. Instead, my promodiser took it without the concessionaire’s consent.

Here were the list of unpaid items inside the kiosk:

1. 12 x pairs of socks (4 packs of 3 pcs Burlington socks)
2. 2 x small stuffed toys
3. 1 x keychain
4. 1 x shirt
5. 6 x pairs of eyeglasses
6. 1 x pair of earrings (Yaya Dub)

To why she has 6 pairs of glasses, I have no clue. But it was there hidden in my kiosk, and only she was responsible.

But this was not only the items she took. Our relievers submitted an incident report dated January 17 that there were the following items that were found inside the kiosk but is no longer there — two cycling shorts, one neck pillow, fitted blouses, 3 wallets with feathers. These items are already missing from the department store.

My promodiser admitted that she only borrowed the things that she was caught with. She told them these were on loan until she paid for them.

Apparently, it’s not stealing if you put a can of coke inside your bag while inside 7-11. It is only stealing if you take it out without paying.

Well, that doesn’t explain how other things were reported missing and were seen in her kiosk, and have now disappeared.

That’s the biggest problem in the Philippines. Cost of business is great here, but managing people is difficult.

They are always excusing themselves. Giving silly reasons on why they are unprofessional.

If they are late, they blame the traffic.

If they don’t sell, they blame the crowd or the customer.

If they steal something, they say they have no clue how it got there.

Only in the Philippines…. only in the Philippines. If you manage people here, you have to get used to the excuses, and to put your foot down and ensure that everyone follows the rules. It’s not easy to be Ms. Bitchy, but sometimes, if you want to successfully manage a business here, you need to trim the fat from the bone, and to not accept bullshit just because the staff is fake crying.

Yaya Chronicles: The Search for a Good Yaya Continues

All of you know that I have been looking for a yaya (stay-in babysitter) ever since my old yaya didn’t come home for the holidays last December. 

While the experience has been very frustrating — we treated her like family, and she didn’t even have the decency to inform us she won’t be returning after we paid for her holiday — I decided to look at at the positive side of it, and rolled up my sleeves to find my daughter another yaya.

Since my yaya left last December, yayas were in short supply as many were also on extended holidays. Agencies couldn’t supply us with any, leaving us with no choice but to find one on our own. Here was my experience in looking for a yaya online.

The yaya I found during the first round only lasted 6 days.

On her sixth day, she texted me saying that her husband was in the hospital and she had to visit him as it might be an emergency. When she started, I made it clear that her first rest day would be after a month, so this request was already out of the ordinary.

As I have many experiences with the help, I knew this was a white lie and decided to simply let her go to her husband, with paid salary, packed bags and all. Here was my experience in handling this yaya.

My point is, despite my best efforts, it was really hard to find a reliable yaya in the Philippines.

Many yayas were malabong kausap: this meant that their words mean nothing. They will promise you the moon and the stars and will miserably fail.

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The next yaya I found online was Tessie, 52 years old, who worked as a housemaid, nanny and caregiver abroad.

I interviewed her on January 4, and we agreed for her to start n January 8.

On January 8 morning, here was her text to me:

Long story short, she was backing out.

This was very annoying because it was done in the last minute. I had waited 4 days for a yaya who didn’t plan on showing up.

The next one I got was interviewed on January 14 (Tuesday). We confirmed to start on January 16 (Thursday) so that she can pack up and spend time with her kids.

On January 15, she asked me if she could start on January 21 (Monday) instead since she needed to get her daughter’s report card in school that Saturday.

I replied to her in Tagalog, “Can’t your husband get the report card? Because we already agreed that you will start on Thursday. It’s difficult if you keep on changing your mind.”

She told me that it was always her husband who gets it but her daughter has requested that she do it this time around. However, given that she had word of honor, she will still arrive as agreed on Thursday.

At 9:57am on Thursday, she sent me the following text complete with photos:

There we go — she can’t make it on Thursday because her son had a fever. If so, she will just start on Monday, which was her original revised request.

This was my answer, “Why are you looking for a job if your family affairs are still not in order? During my interview, you told me that your mother-in-law and husband are the ones who take care of your children so that you can work. Now, you are telling me that you have to be there for your son because your husband is MIA.”

I understand that she needed to work and she cannot leave them when they are sick. But the problem is not the child. I was okay with her taking care of the child if the children was said to be her priority during the interview. However, she already told me her children would not be a problem, even if they are.

The problem is that she had no word of honor. And I do not like to deal with people who were malabong kausap.

So I told her to take care of her kids and to just manage her household instead.

Ironically, on Monday, she texted me again saying she wanted to work for me.

No sirree…!

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After receiving disappointing news, I renewed my search for another yaya. This time, I found someone on Facebook once again.

Zeny was 50 year old, from Mindoro, and was an all around yaya. She served in a family of Manila for 4.5 years.

I talked to her on Thursday, January 15, the same time that Mitch backed out. And we agreed that she start on Sunday, January 20, evening.

Her daughter would buy her ticket from Mindoro to Manila, and she is to go direct to our condo.

We waited with abated breath. After frequent disappointments over Arlene, Tessie and Mitch, we had low expectations. If Zeny did not show up, we would not be too surprised anymore.

Surprisingly, she showed up at 6:30 am on Sunday, just as agreed.

So far, so good. It’s been at least a day, and she’s still here.

She is a bit quiet, but caring and seems serious about the job. I hope she’s already the One for us.

And if not, the search continues — Just this January, my daughter has had 3 yayas in quick succession. It is so depressing that it’s now amusing.

At the end of the day, if we need a yaya, we need a yaya. I will go through as many yayas as I can so that I can find someone to take care of my daughter.

Let’s hope that this is already the one we are looking for. 🙂

Additional: 10 Tips in Looking for a Yaya Online

 

 

When your 3 Year Old gets Stubborn

My daughter refuses to finish her lunch because she wants to open up her new gift, a Cinderella castle made of Lego.

So she’s at the floor moping, whining and refusing to eat her lunch.

It’s dirty on the floor, but she doesn’t care. She wants to play Lego with her daddy, and SHE MUST BE FOLLOWED.

Mind you, she just turned 3 last December.

This is going to be fun.

So, we stick it in: No reward if you don’t listen to Mommy and daddy.

She goes around the living room.

She plays with other toys.

She goes to the kitchen.

Crosses her arms and pouts several times.

We push her to eat.

No banana.

Lord, she is stubborn.

She tries to stall, cry, whine and delay the process.

We stick it out.

Today’s our rest day and we have nowhere to go.

Finally, she eats.

She eats hesitantly, still goes around the dining area, but she eats.

And finishes her corn.

“Now Cinderella castle?” she asks me.

“Sure, Cinderella castle,” I replied.

It was an old gift given to her by her grandmother. It’s really for her anyway.

She is happy.

Now, she and her dad play the Lego castle this afternoon.

Sigh, since when did 3 year old kids start to reason out like this? When I was a kid, my dad’s rule was law and everyone simply listened and followed.

My 3 year old has her own mind. She wants to be followed. And she sulks when she doesn’t get her way.

“Mommy and daddy fight with me,” she would say.

Well, she’s 3.

We make the rules, and kids must follow them. And if they don’t, we won’t lift a single finger and give them what they want.

Looks like it’s working. 😇😍❤️

To more fights and adventures ahead!

I want a Rolex but Buy a Timex

Big sale in SM Mall of Asia

I bought this classic Timex watch during the big SM sale. It cost me less than php 1,740.00 (USD 30) at 50% off.

The watch on my wishlist is a Rolex.

But at a price of at least USD 4,000 a piece, it seems impractical to purchase something that would still tell the same time.

So I buy the Timex.

In times like these, best to be practical. Anyway, a Rolex is a treat. A treat can wait.

Work and success first, then treat.

My best friend tells me to purchase a Panerei.

“Bonita, the gold one costs two mill but they will release a stainless one that will only cost half a million,” she said.

In my head, I know of Cartier, IWC, Patek Philippe, Rolex, but this is the first time I’ve heard of Panerei.

Apparently, that’s important in the world of watches, which shows there’s still more I should learn in how to be a dona.

Let me stick to my Timex for now. Presently, I don’t think I have ₱500,000+ to spare for a watch.

There will be times for higher priced ticket purchases.

It’s just not today.

I Work: Am I a Failure as a Wife and Mother?

It’s very frustrating to be a working wife and mother.

Society still demands you to fulfill your duties as a doting yaya to your child, a neat maid to your household (which includes laba, plantsa and taga-linis ng bahay) and an eager sex partner and a sweet companion to your husband, DESPITE also working at least 8 hours in the daytime to bring home the bacon since husband’s income is not enough to smoothly sustain the family.

After working the entire day, one would wish to have some time to kick back, relax, and do nothing but zone out.

But no. At the end of the day, the husband still wants food on the table (instead of you ordering out), the baby still requires attention, the laundry still needs washing, and the house still needs cleaning.

“Such is a woman’s lot,” my more traditional mom would say. “How can you expect your husband to do woman’s work?”

I saw this meme today which perfectly explains a modern woman’s problem:

This meme perfectly describes me: My husband has changed our baby’s diaper a few thousand times since she was born. He does our family’s laundry since we were married. So apparently, based on this meme, I am a complete and utter failure as his wife and partner. 😦

Great…. just great.

Nobody notices that I have worked all day to ensure the money still comes flowing in. Nobody notices how good I am at work. Nobody notices that the baby is still alive, and my husband has received more comforts in life married to me than not.

Nooooo… the only thing society sees? 

My husband bathing our baby and changing her diaper. My husband doing the laundry, while his wife plops in bed and relaxes. Basically, all society sees is a man, doing woman’s work.

What a tragedy, the worst fate a man should have.

It is a tragedy to be a woman nowadays. A Christian blog writer created a viral post after making a chart on whether women should maintain careers or not. In her chart, “Should Mothers Have Careers,” she makes a strong play that it’s better for women to give up their careers and become full-time home makers for the following reasons:

I am the woman described on the left side of the chart. The Career Woman:

• Who is always away from home the entire day
• Whose childcare is outsourced to others, namely the Lola or the yaya
• Who comes home exhausted, plops in bed and watches Netflix while the home stays in disarray
• Whose dinner is usually microwaved or take out
• Who reads a book before putting a child to bed
• Whose weekends is simply buying basic goods for the week ahead
• Whose intimacy is limited to once a week if any given both she and her husband is tired (hence, the only child problem)

The only thing I did not agree with is the last part — I do NOT believe that my life is falling apart, and I do NOT believe I am a failure as a wife and mother.

It is because of such pessimistic messages that discourages women to be the best people we hope to be. What is the point of studying so hard, striving to get the best jobs, only to give them up once you have a baby or two?

“Yes, I am a proud housewife,” one would say. “Family first. I know my priorities. What is money if I can’t do my best for my kids?”

That’s the problem — We assume that we have to be there for our husband and kids 24/7 in order for us to be happy. As if servicing them is our lifelong noble goal, and we do not deserve to find happiness in our own terms. 

I can’t see that for myself. Not yet, and maybe not ever. Who says that one’s life path should be a full time homemaker and mother in order to be happy?

Why should this be the only path?

Men work all the time, and they’re NOT ostracized for putting their career first.

So why are women judged on a different standards and are seen as failure for not putting their kids and husbands first?

Here’s the clincher, especially in today’s society, what if the woman has better earning power than the men? Does this mean that the man still needs to take the responsibility of being the family’s breadwinners just because society says so? Or, should women take up the mantle and the men stay home with the kids?

I strongly disagree that women should only stay at home. I was not trained that way by my family — My dad has trained me to study hard and earn money — and I do not think I am a failure for never really knowing how to clean the bathroom, do the laundry or iron the clothes.

Why should I do it especially since I can always outsource it to someone else who can do it better than I am?

It’s hard to be a woman. Society deems you a failure if you do not take on the household works. Society thinks you’re a bad wife if your husband takes on what should be your job. But I don’t think that should be the case.

The Bible tells us of The Wife of Noble Character in Proverbs 31:10-31.

Epilogue: The Wife of Noble Character

^10 [a]A wife of noble character who can find?
    She is worth far more than rubies.
¹¹ Her husband has full confidence in her
    and lacks nothing of value.
¹² She brings him good, not harm,
    all the days of her life.
¹³ She selects wool and flax
    and works with eager hands.
¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships,
    bringing her food from afar.
¹⁵ She gets up while it is still night;
    she provides food for her family
    and portions for her female servants.
¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it;
    out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
¹⁷ She sets about her work vigorously;
    her arms are strong for her tasks.
¹⁸ She sees that her trading is profitable,
    and her lamp does not go out at night.
¹⁹ In her hand she holds the distaff
    and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
²⁰ She opens her arms to the poor
    and extends her hands to the needy.
²¹ When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
    for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
²² She makes coverings for her bed;
    she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
²³ Her husband is respected at the city gate,
    where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them,
    and supplies the merchants with sashes.
²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity;
    she can laugh at the days to come.
²⁶ She speaks with wisdom,
    and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household
    and does not eat the bread of idleness.
²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed;
    her husband also, and he praises her:
²⁹ “Many women do noble things,
    but you surpass them all.”
³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
    but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
³¹ Honor her for all that her hands have done,
    and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

I do not read that a good and noble woman should cook, do the laundry and clean the house. Instead, the actual words is that she “provides” food for her family and give portions to the servants. 

As a working woman, I have provided food for my household. I have paid for our unit’s association dues, our family’s electricity bill and most expenses in our household. Like my husband, I provide for us and make life easier for him and our daughter

The Proverbs 31 woman is a good businessman. She buys a field and plants a vineyard. She EARNS for the family. Her trading is profitable and she works day and night. Even during times of cold, she provides wool for her family. Wool is expensive and requires money. The Bible didn’t say she asked money from her husband. Instead, the Bible said that the woman provided.

Because of who she is, how she acts, and what she does, her husband holds his head up eye and is respected in society.  “Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.” Do you think a man will be respected if his wife was a harlot and an embarrassment?

Actually, reading Proverbs 31, I am encouraged and renewed. The Bible does not look down on busy working women. In fact, it is full of praise, which is appreciated.

I pray that I do not lose too much hope and give up my ministry.

My work provides jobs to at least 40 staff members, mostly women, and I feel that this is how I give back to the Lord. I have seen so many women uplift their lives after being provided a stable job that gives them good income. Many of my employees came from broken families. They were beaten and cheated on by their good for nothing husbands, their children left in the care of their elderly parents. My role here is to keep them employed in the hopes of empowering them to make better decisions for themselves and their families.

I believe that my daughter will benefit in seeing that Mommy is working.

I think being a home maker is equally wonderful and noble, but I do wish my daughter to find her fulfillment in pursuing her passions (which is hopefully income generating), than merely being a cost center to her husband when she grows up.

I wish that Society will be more forgiving to women.

Men have started to lose their manliness and have relegated to the sidelines. More and more men stay on the sidelines of unemployment and depend on their families and their working wives to make money for the family. It is my hope that society can be but fair to women and let them also relax after a hard day’s work especially if they now are bringing home the bacon.

I hope that women would be more supportive of each other.

Everybody’s life and desires are different, so it’s best to respect each other’s life decisions. Kudos to you in wanting to be a stay at home mother, but can you please also be supportive to me as I choose a different path from you?

Lastly, I know I am making the right decision for me.

My father has trained me to make money. I am equally contributing to our household. My daughter is still alive and is doing well in school. My husband grumbles I have less time for him, and wants me to be more service-oriented, but finds a way to show appreciation after seeing the alternative.

I am a working wife and mother. And I am good at it. I hope others would find encouragement to know that it’s okay to work and still be a good mother and partner to your kids. 

Happy weekend!

 

 

 

 

How I Found a New Yaya Online

I decided to try the Internet in my search for a brand new yaya because all agencies I called up in December had a low supply of yayas to choose from because most of the yayas had gone home for the holidays.

As the agencies I know usually charge me Php 8,000 to Php 15,000 for every referral, I figured, why not save on the agency fee and try my luck on the Internet?

Anyway, I’ve always believed that all agencies do is to refer a yaya to you. The hard job of interviewing, screening and deciding still land on the hands of the employer. So I posted the following ad online on my search for a new yaya for my daughter:

---

LOOKING FOR TODDLER YAYA

RESPONSIBILITIES:
* To take care of and monitor a happy, normal 3 year old daughter (Bring her to school, feed/bathe/play with her, etc.)
* Launder our clothes via washing machine (Fold then return back to cabinet)
* Tidy up general surroundings (e.g., sweep and mop floor, tidy up. We live in a condo).

PERSONALITY NEEDED: Happy and pleasant, trustworthy, honest, hardworking, and reliable. Easy going and neat (pero hindi kailangang OC. Hindi kami maselan). May kusa at malambing sa bata.

SALARY:
* Monthly: PHP 9,000.00
* Rest day: 2 days per month. I pay for the two days you didn’t take, so add Php 692.31 per month. Net pay per month with two rest days = Php 9,692.31.
* SSS, Philhealth, Pagibig from 4th month, 13th month pay, 5 days SIL after 1 year of service
* Have own room and toilet. Yaya buys own toiletries.

REQUIREMENTS:
* Completed Bio-data
* Photo
* NBI Clearance (Valid and unexpired)
* Barangay Clearance
* Birth Certificate (NSO/PSA)

TO APPLY:
1. PM me requirements and cellphone number. I will call you for interview if you qualify.
2, If I like you, I will hire you. You have to come to Manila at your own expense though. No to padala pamasahe. We can pick you up from Cubao or Makati.

NOTE:
* We don’t do CAs or bale.
* Cellphone only after duty hours.
* No cooking needed. Still, we need someone who is not maselan sa pagkain.

---

To my surprise, I got a bit of traction with my online ad. More than a handful of candidates PM’d me to try their luck. To be honest, I was quite humbled with the fact that so many people was interested in applying:

One of the things that I have going for me is the fact that I was offering a slightly higher than average salary for a yaya.

The minimum wage for a kasambahay in the Philippines is Php 3,500.00 per month with four rest days. On average, many employers offer a range of Php 4,000 to 7,000 for a yaya. As you can see in the ad, I was offering Php 9,000, which is already 30-50% higher than what most employers are offering.

I didn’t do it to get more applicants. That was just the happy effect.

However, my daughter’s yaya has always earned an average monthly salary of Php 8,000-12,000. I have sourced these yayas through various agencies who charge me a referral fee of Php 8,000 to Php 15,000 per referral. So the amount I was offering is on par to what I have offered every single yaya on my employ.

In addition, I have paid for the correct benefits, are okay with 13th month pay and have given our yayas over and above what they have given us in service. All of our yayas were able to save up and uplift their lives while under our employ.

So what’s not to like?

We were confident we were pretty good and fair employers. Our child was normal and healthy, and any yaya who comes to us is lucky to be part of our family.

Why more employers should consider the Internet when looking for yayas

The great thing about using the Internet when looking for yayas is that you get to see their Facebook accounts, scroll through their online histories, and see what type of people they are via looking at their social media posts.

Yayas I don’t even consider:

1. Those who post sexy photos of themselves over the Internet. Yes, apparently, they have no shame in showing off their bodies. Great when you’re looking for a good time, but probably not the best candidates for a yaya for my 3-year old girl:

2. Those who post angry or emo-like status updates. A red flag is someone who complains about their employers online. Negativity is not something I’d like to invite in my home.

3. Those who posts too many selfies of themselves online. Too much vanity!!! I also don’t feel comfortable when they pose around the house, take photos and post them online.

4. Those who post photos of the kids they take care of online. It’s not their call to post photos of their employers’ children on the Internet.

5. Those who don’t read the ad in full and keep on asking the same questions over and over. Like many of those who applied do not even have the requirements I need to consider them. Their NBI Clearance is expired. They have no valid IDs. Or they’re in the province and not in Manila. What’s the point of inquiring if you have no interest in coming here to work since you have no money?

6. Those who are too young and don’t have the work experience for the job at hand. Apologies, but an 18 year old is too young to be a yaya for my daughter at a rate of Php 9,000. I would prefer someone older who knows how to take care of different types of kids.

Yayas I considered:

1. Those who are slightly older, at least 28 years old and above. 
2. Those with relatively happy families. I am okay with single mothers, but I hope that they have a good head on their shoulders.
3. Yayas who actually have all the required documents on hand.
4. Those who didn’t really pose any red flags during the phone interview. Here are the Questions I Ask in a Phone Interview with Yaya.

The yaya I finally chose was 46 years old, happily married to the same man for 23 years, and have two older boys, 19 and 21 years old. She ticked all the boxes, and was fine with all my conditions, and was willing to come in on the 28th, which was before January:

Anyway, life is short. Why not try out new things? At worse case I don’t like this yaya, we can always terminate her and find a new one. It’s not as if we cannot survive without a yaya. If we fail, try and try again.

She seems okay with our little baby. Of course, our baby prefers the old yaya but hey, we make do with what we have.

So there we go. I hope you can try finding a yaya too online.

Who knows?

The yaya for life we are looking for may just be right in the corner, waiting for us to post online. 🙂

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

Additional: 10 Tips in Looking for a Yaya Online

When your Daughter becomes a Monster

“It’s Mine…. It’s Mine… It’s MIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNEEEEE!” screamed my usually lovely 3-year old, who suddenly turned into a Baby Hyde in a matter of seconds.

She was at the floor, writhing and clutching at the big baby bottle filled with marshmallows. I think she didn’t want me to touch the bottle, which she said was hers.

I have never seen anyone treat such item with such possessiveness, and there she was, my daughter, insisting that nobody, not even her loving mommy, should touch her and her big precious baby bottle.

She was never really like this.

Before she hit three, she was always sweet and adorable. She sometimes sulked when she didn’t get her way, but never like this.

As soon as she turned three, she became this:

When a child’s tantrum unexpectedly hits, a mother is usually caught offguard.

What happened to my sweet, malambing baby, who turned into this terrifying crying mess that don’t want to be touched or bothered? All of a sudden, cheap purchases become priceless, and she’s ready to scream, gnaw and hit anyone who dare touch what she deems is hers.

So what did we do?

We let her cry.

And cry.

And CRY.

We watched her with a neutral expression, made sure that she doesn’t hurt herself and let her scream and cry on the floor.

As long as she was safe, we were fine with her pulling the tantrum.

I slightly felt like a mean and unsupportive parent, but shrugged the mommy guilt away. What can we do? She was being a brat, and unreasonable. And maybe it’s the Terrible Threes (She just turned 3 last December 9) that everyone’s been talking about.

Hooooboy. The crying took at least 30 minutes, and it felt like forever.

But it was fine.

After she got tired, I asked her if she wanted to mammam and she tearingly said yes. As she breastfed, she started to calm down…. and sniffled all the way through.

Half an hour later, she was back to her sweet self again, as if nothing happened. It was just as surprising for us to see her wail and scream and shout, and then cling happily to us with nary a guilt or memory on what happened.

Note to Self: The next time it happens, just keep your cool. Watch with a bemused smile, and make sure she doesn’t hurt herself. Talk calmly and wait for the anger to subside.

My lovely lady tantrumed again a few days later, but it was shorter this time, around 10 minutes. I guess she learned that she may feel angry and express it, but heck if she gets her way.

So tantrum all you want dear girl.

Let it out.

It’s better to show it now when you’re three than later.

At the end of the day, mommy still loves you, and will be there for you after we pick up the pieces.

And no, you still won’t get your way.

We are still her parents after all.

Happy new year!